Alone

[Jyo]

Here I am again. Like this. It never seems to change fully. Thought Jyo standing on the beach during the night. There was no moon but the sky was full of stars and a gental breeze tugged at his clothing and hair. It had been a few weeks since he'd last seen Bella out of school the only place he had felt comfortabl seeing her as rastal wouldn't target her. But now she was apparently gone. Except for Lene it was that way with anyone who ever mattered to him. A brief flash of companionship and they were gone. Sohpia, Trinity, Krista, And now Bella. Only Lene was left and she was his adopted child.

But for some odd reason Jyo didn't feel any sadness. Just a tad of regret and empty. That was the extent of his feelings. After he had broken down to Bella he hadn't let emotion show through again. Mabey all he needed was that release. But he had hoped something more would have come from it. But here he was. Alone except for one person in the world. He had nothing but her and his fighting skills. No real friends and nobody he felt he could turn to for help. he hadn't done well with gaining anyone's trust here. Jyo was feeling completely alone.

Why don't I feel anything though. I'm just as human as anyone else. Surely they would feel differently about this. Why don't I? What's keeping me from going out and connecting with someone? He thought looking out to the rolling waves of the beach before closing his eyes standing deep in thought.

[Winters]

OOC: If neccesary, feel free to skip over me, if someone more interesting comes along. I've become a slower poster, and my posts are just plain crap, nowadays.

Passing Glance

..It's not like it mattered much. But it was the beach, and for some reason, that was enough. The rolling waves. From how he felt, it brought about an equilibrium to his life, if he listened long enough. Time to forget, just let things pass him by.. and think. For the moment, emotions were simply not there. Didn't have to care about conformity, was just able to.. 'free-float'. And as simple as the clouds rolling by in that peaceful night, well, that was enough.

Enough.

Standing by the pier, Jonathan slowly made his way through, onto the sandy beaches, taking his time. His eyes left to gaze into the worlds above, and ponder. An endless sea.. of stars. Somehow, the insignificance of it all destressed him a little. Little more at ease. No matter what his problems were, they were never too small, never too large. But of course, seeking out problems wasn't the logical thing to do anyways. Hands in his pocket, he continued on, his glasses reflecting the stars, if ever so slightly. His vest was zipped up, but, honestly, it wasn't that cold. Just..

Peaceful.

But, admist all that peace, he had a strange feeling. As though he wasn't currently alone at that moment. His eyes opened up slightly, as he tried to focus in on from the distance. Just another person.

His feet walking slowly on the beach, he kept watchful not to disturb this fellow, as he passed him by. Couldn't stop all the noise, but he went slow enough to minimize it just barely under the ocean waves. That didn't change the fact however.. that he was not alone. Just seven feet past this stranger, he looked on ahead, across, down the side of the beach. How long had he been going to this place for now? Several months.. and nothing had really happened. Nothing that he knew, or ashamedly cared about. But, he had nothing to say.

Nothing.

So why then.. why then did he turn around? He looked at this person.. eyes closed. Long red hair. Looked familiar. Gotten into a few fights with some schoolmates, perhaps? Didn't matter much. Instead, rather seriously, he turned, one of his steps made purposely louder, as he pivoted on the sand, and looked out.. looked out into that endless ocean.

Hands in his pockets, he saw nothing more then a beautiful night. A beautiful night to be wasted on someone like himself, while someone else could be enjoying it further. Taking a sidelong glance, he wondered if the other had noticed him. But, even if he didn't.. just didn't matter much either way.

..Just that endless rolling..

[Jyo]

Hearing a step clearly made to get his attention Jyo's eyes snapped open and his head turned quickly enough that his hair was flowing along lifted up by the momentum. Jyo saw another person standing not far away from him. Probably a student at the school likely a freshman or a sohpomore. He couldn't be sure. Nobody really could without some foresight of such things.

Jyo wasn't really sure how to react though. He had come here as this particular spot was never occupied when he came here. But he apparently ran across someone else who came here now. He had originally come for some time to think and be away from the rest of the world. It seemed that was shattered now.

He looked back out over the ocean.
"It's one of the few sights that can make one realize that they don't play as big a role in the overall importance of things isn't it. Though it's still one of the more pleasing sights one can view." He said figuring they were probably thinking along the same lines.

[Winters]

Schwäche. Belanglosigkeit. Segnung.

"It's one of the few sights that can make one realize that they don't play as big a role in the overall importance of things isn't it. Though it's still one of the more pleasing sights one can view."

Insignificance. Either one of the most depressing or truly relaxing facts of life. On one hand, people as a whole struggled to do things to allow them to be remembered. Statues of legendary men and women, standing today, centuries later, their faces immortalized, 'til metal or rock breaks, and the memories of them too become nothing more but insignificant losses. An ironic tragedy upon itself. Those who chose, more rather, to accept it, and make do with the time they were granted however, generally seemed much more happier, a burden off their shoulders, knowing that it was not about themselves, but about the future, their children, the next generation that they had to take care of, and living, striving, suceeding to make sure that such lives bloomed with the next wave of potential that would gradually ebb away at the flows of time to make the world slightly better, a little bit at a time.

A little bit.

For himself.. Jonathan only nodded, chewing at those words in his mind. Long, white hair blew its way past him, accompanied by a chilling wind. After all, what was he to say? He was a stutter. But, for the moment, the shadows of the night made it so that he wasn't fully visible anyways. Hardly mattered, even if this guy went to the same school. This was just life.. and there was a large chance he wouldn't see this guy again, anyways.

"...Ja."

Quiet enough.. just enough to say 'yes' in German. Public Highschool 259 wasn't a terrible place. But fights had a tendency to break out. Was this guy one of those people? Searching himself, along his arms, he moved his right one slightly. Weak. Still so weak.. but it'd been a while since his accident. And as he thought about his accident, more thoughts flooded in. I'm fortunate, after all, to only have my English stuttered. I can still speak. And that, above all makes my little incident just another insignificant accident. Hardly matters from now, my feelings won't matter, years from now, having little to no impact on this place. It's all fine.

..But, for some reason, his head was beginning to feel hot. And it bothered him. It bothered him that this was bothering him. Throwing caution to the wind, his eyes locked onto the stranger. "..Y-You."

Pocketing his hands, he looked onward. He hadn't really ment to disturb this guy anyways, but, since they were both there.. he might as well practice his conversation, slightly.

Let's give it a shot.

"259?"

[Jyo]

Jyo's sensitive hearing made the response al the audible for him. He didn't fail to notice the accent either. The kid's bearing seemed of someone who wasn't really nervous but rather wary of him. Not surprising considering the common way young adults tended to act lately. Jyo could understand how someone who was a complete stranger speaking to you out of the blue could be unnerving.

Jyo gave a nod in response.
"Yeah. Just like most other kids in the area. How about you?" He asked. noticing the way the kid had some trouble speaking to an extent. Jyo had the feeling it wasn't from stupidity or anything. Either he wasn't used to english or he had some problems earlier that brought it on.

[Winters]

OOC: Pardon the crappy post. I'm terrible at small talk.

Silence's Soliloquy

"Yeah. Just like most other kids in the area. How about you?" Jyo's nod, though, wasn't seen, Jonathan still looked out, transfixed by both the ocean and the stars. "Y-Y-Y... Ja." A struggle, but then... the last few months had been.. pretty quiet. Didn't expect himself to get back into the swing of things in just a single go. Talking was a practice that some abused, never learning to fully appreciate it. Just throwing words around for the sake of talking, for the sake of attention. The girls at their school... the preppy type. Those that would talk so much, gossiping about the lightest of things, destroying people's reputations, making rumors. There was disgust and contempt in Jonathan's mind for them. But, he knew he wasn't wholly innocent of this himself, in earlier years. And there was a touch of self-hatred that he knew was residing, somewhere in his mind.

There was nothing really to say, in truth. But...

..Why not...

"...N-N-Name..?"

To be honest, this guy looked somewhat familiar. Vaguely, though. Did he.. see him around much? Winters didn't pay too much attention to the fighting, but... he'd seen enough to recognize some of the 'normals' at it..

[Jyo]

Jyo's thoughts were confirmed. Apparently the guy did have some problems with speech andit wasn't just some form of shying away. Jyo wondered what brought it on. Speech problems were the results of many factors. Most of them unpleasent. But he wasn't one to pry really.
"Name's Jyo. Haven't gotten well known around here I see. Works for me. I've been attempting to keep a lower profile around here." he said with a soft smile at thought of the reputation he used to have. It wasn't pleasent as he was constantly challenged for his title instead of his skills like he was here.

"And whats your name?' he asked. he was going to make things simple to answer. The guy seemed okay enough with one word answers so Jyo would try and make it easy for him.

[Winters]

Winter on the Beach

"Name's Jyo. Haven't gotten well known around here I see. Works for me. I've been attempting to keep a lower profile around here."

Lower profile? What a strange comment. Enough for Jonathan to get an inkling of curiosity at. His head turned slightly enough in time to catch the small smile on Jyo's lips. For Jonathan.. he felt as though he understood something, to a certain point. Perhaps not for the same reasons, but, both had tried to keep a low profile. He nodded slightly, several times like a bobble-head, to show he understood. Jyo.

That was.. perhaps familiar, but he never recalled hearing this name before, in truth-

"And whats your name?"

Jonathan's eyebrows raised slightly. This was a first, since his time in PHS 259. Never, in these past months, had he been asked this. Almost staring, a smile almost.. almost crept onto his face. What resulted instead was an eye smile. An eye smile being the true smile.

He paused for a bit, as his eyes looked up, wondering..

"...Jonathan Winters."

Eyes flicking back to Jyo, he shrugged slightly. Apparently, after all those months without talking, much less a speech impediment, he could still say his own name. Guess some things are just too ingrained in people. Didn't mean to say both, but, might as well. Adjusting his weight to his right foot, he was amazed at the fact that he didn't feel cold right now. Being able to still say his own name.. warmed him up a bit. Enough to keep at this conversation. Taking a few steps, towards the ocean, he stopped about three feet distance, from the side of Jyo, and stopped to look at the ocean.

A fore long glance was all he took.. but it was enough. This guy had muscles.. had strength. Something that he'd lost. Lost to himself, like some small insignificant thing disappears into the endless, crashing waves of water, the ocean. ..Strength.

Had to ask.

"..H-H..H-H-H-Hey. H-H-H-Hope I-I'm n-n-not p-pushing an-anything, b-but.. a-are y-you s-strong?"

Even before he struggled to say it.. it sounded childish. But then, without any parents to ask, how else could he ask such stupid questions without asking them at all? But, he was serious. The tone of his voice, in spite of his impediment.. Strength.

..Burning at him.

[Jyo]

Jyo raised an eyebrow at the question. It didn't bother him but it was also not something people often asked him out of the blue like that. But John apparently wanted to be polite about it considering the way he asked. So Jyo felt no reason not to answer.
"Well John I guess you could say that. In terms of physical strength I'm more powerful than some. But I've met those much stronger than me before." He said. He wasn't really thrown off by the question but he would be lying to say he saw that one coming like that.
"Permit me to ask a question in turn. Why do you ask me that?' He said.

[Winters]

Backbone With No Muscle

"Well John I guess you could say that. In terms of physical strength I'm more powerful than some. But I've met those much stronger than me before." An indirect answer, with a touch of humbleness in it. That was all he needed to hear to answer that.. the confidence was in his voice. Jonathan kept staring out at the ocean, hands pocketed in, blue-green eyes looking out at the ocean.

"Permit me to ask a question in turn. Why do you ask me that?"

For a stupid question of his own, he wasn't surprised at the reaction. His right hand came out of his pocket, going to his chin, absentmindedly blinking to keep his hair from falling into his eyes. Mulling over it for a moment, his eyes furrowed slightly, before relaxing again. "..F-For th-the s-same r-reasons t-that a-a w-weak p-person s-seeks p-po-power." was a quieter response. Almost lost in thought.. his eyes were absolutely transfixed in the ocean.. as if.. trying to see something, just over that next wave. As if to search for something.. he just couldn't reach.

"...A-And b-because... I-I'm t-trying t-to f-find m-m-my r-r-r-reason f-for w-w-w-wanting b-b-being str-strong. I-I'm f-forgetting wh-what i-it f-felt l-like.."

..And because I feel so helpless. As if I'm climbing up a mountain made of mud. And my goal is at the top, throwing everything at me, to prevent me from getting what was formally mine. He turned sidelong.. as if breaking from a trance, yet still in another world.

...The reason to be strong..

..What was mine in the first place?

For some reason, he felt as though he had so many questions to ask, because of this man's aura. But, he didn't want to ask anymore. What was his reason for becoming strong? What did he do with that strength? What does.. being strong feel like?..

Strength.

[Jyo]

"The same reason for the weak wanting to be strong...? How very interesting. In my experiance there has never been a single reason. To each one's own. You seem to have lost sight of your purpose. I'm sorry I can't help you much there. it's not my place to direct anyone in such matters." He said thinking back to his own days spent training and the goals he himself had. Jyo was always eager to push his limits and help others do so along the way. That was really why he fought to become stronger. To see what the true limit a person could reach was.

"Though what I can do is give you the advice the man that taught me divulged upon me. 'You are never done learning. Strength is only a means to an end. Not the goal but a tool to reach that goal.'" He said finally facing John with a small smile.
"Sorry I can't do much more than that." he said.

[Winters]

Gefühl Unklug

"Though what I can do is give you the advice the man that taught me divulged upon me. 'You are never done learning. Strength is only a means to an end. Not the goal but a tool to reach that goal.'" Jonathan drank in those words slowly, and remained quiet for quite a bit. "Sorry I can't do much more than that." Looking over, Jonathan only shrugged his shoulders, as Jyo smiled at him. Pity? Perhaps. But something struck him as.. odd.

"..P-Purpose?"

Now it was his turn to raise an eye-brow. Because, this was something he didn't normally think about. Jyo stated it simply. As a means to a goal. Things that.. things that.. There was a large smile.. in Jonathan's eyes, as he looked at Jyo. "...Th-Thank y-you. N-Never th-thought a-b-ab-about it l-like th-that." He looked away again, uncertain of what to say. Jonathan had been wandering aimlessly. Jyo had been standing here for a purpose. The least he could do.. was at least return the favor, then, maybe help him find his answer.

"..S-So th-then.. i-if y-you d-d-don't m-mind m-me a-asking o-one m-more th-thing.." he said, now looking at Jyo. "..Wh-Why a-are y-you h-here, by-by y-yourself, i-if y-you d-don't m-mind m-me a-asking?"

..It'd been a while, since he talked like this. Concerned about someone else. Felt good, better then just.. talking about himself. Always saying to himself how he was always listening to people, when in fact, all he was doing was just.. eavesdropping on random bits of gossip, and then being sick of people, to the point of almost completely disassociating himself with them.

[Jyo]

Jyo's smile got bigger at the mention of a thanks. It was clear he was at least able to help even if just a little.
"Don't mention it. i find the best comfort is in helping others." He said and looked back out over the ocean. He was silent until Johnathan spoke and brought up the matter of him being here.

"Well I don't mind you asking. But I don't exactly feel comfortable talking of it. But I also wouldn't lie to you. I'm here by myself because thats virtually how I always am. Alone really. I don't tend to open up to others easily and keep them shut out really. It's got me thinking about how I ought to change some things. I have one person who means anything to me. And to be honest... It bothers me that I don't seem to have any feelings on the matter at all. This has always been a good place for me to think since moving here. So here I am." He said.

Somehow this too didn't seem to unsettle Jyo. Speaking to someone he didnt really know about this matter. it was bothering him slightly that it had such a little effect on him.

[Winters]

Alone...?

"Well I don't mind you asking. But I don't exactly feel comfortable talking of it. But I also wouldn't lie to you. I'm here by myself because thats virtually how I always am. Alone really. I don't tend to open up to others easily and keep them shut out really. It's got me thinking about how I ought to change some things. I have one person who means anything to me. And to be honest... It bothers me that I don't seem to have any feelings on the matter at all. This has always been a good place for me to think since moving here. So here I am."

..That solitude. Jonathan had been by himself long enough to have an inkling of what Jyo was talking about. He kept quiet, as Jyo seemed to mull things over, allowing himself sometime to think of what Jyo had just said as well. He said he didn't open up easily, yet, here they were, talking about themselves. And often, he found, it was with random strangers, when you had the need to talk, that they would listen.. and appreciate that you listen, simply because you could. Jonathan hadn't found anyone like that in quite a long time. Never, in fact, save military school. And even then, it was sporadic.

The silence was devouring.

Quietly, Jonathan's own thoughts began to collect.. more questions. But, not about himself, this time. His face, unchanging, turned to look at Jyo. "..S-So th-then.."

"...I-If y-you e-en-enjoy h-helping p-people, wh-why a-are you-you a-a-a-alone? Th-Th-Thinking i-is g-good f-for p-p-p-p-planning o-out y-your pl-plans, b-but un-until y-you a-act o-on th-them.. d-doesn't th-that m-mean no-nothing i-is ac-accomplished?"

His face turned back to the ocean. People were hypocritical. He himself was very hypocritical, and he knew it.. but, he was beginning to realize something, as he stood here, with this guy. Having someone there really did.. help. And this reflected upon Jonathan as well. For now... all he could do was ask questions. Probe, if that's what you want to term it. See if Jyo would come through any new revelations.

..But, he was just a freshmen. Less experienced.. so, if anything, it was only a simple gesture of kindness, on his own part.

To be strong..

There was a responsiblity. There was the mentality to be able to restrain yourself. And then, there was the responsibility to help others with that strength. Jyo.. he was strong. Could sense it so easily.

Perhaps though, it was Jonathan that needed to learn a little bit more, to see how the world really works..

[Jyo]

Jyo chuckled at the comment.
"An informed question. One hard to really provide a good answer for. Though I guess I can give it a try." He said. Jyo honestly didn't know the answer. If he did he would be able to have taken steps to correct this matter.
"I guess I help people because it seems to be the right thing to do. I don't know why I'm alone. I think it's because too few people share my views on things these days. And the fact is I don't really know how to interact with people beyond a more professional manner and how to fight. My only strengths." He said with a shrug. Most people would have a hint of sadness in their voices. That wasn't the case with Jyo. he just sounded empty really. Just a person stating the facts without any emotional base to the comments.