Developmental Desperation (Josiah)

[Josiah]

Such a sad reminder to keep with herself, he wondered why, why was it she wanted to be remembered every day she looked in the mirror, why not just forget it, was she really that strong emotionally to live with that kind of reminder on her every day?

“I like your name” Josiah said softly his hand still working on her inner thigh. Had be been another kind of man this would have been the perfect opertunity to stroke her but that was not him. His other hand that was around her waist was playing softly on her silk clad hip, his touch was not ment to be sensual just relaxing though he could not control what it did to her.

He leaned close to her ear “It sound perfect…especially when I do this” his lips came to her ear and softly in a tone that could be considered a lovers whisper he said it just once “Sage” his whisper drawing it out his warm breath tickling the skin of her neck.

He pulled back lightly and gave her a small smile, he had heard her question but had been ready for it long before she had ever asked it.

“I…I’ve never had a good experience with it….any one whom I trusted enough to touch me has always betrayed me” and in a sense it was true “I…I just wanted to stop getting hurt…so I gave up on it and letting people have that right to get close enough were they felt it was okay to touch me” It was a lie but he was not ready to admit to the truth, no he just couldn’t not yet.

Sadly he had no idea what she had over heard in his nightmares.

[Siege]

“I like your name”

She swallowed as she looked up at him, her large grey eyes looked up at him curiously. Shocked that he liked her name so much, she hated it, mainly because of who had given it to her, and she was very unused to it. Though like Siege she figured that if she heard it enough that she would get used to it.

“It sound perfect…especially when I do this”

She looked up as he moved closer. Her eyes closed as she felt his breath on her face and then.. he whispered.. her name. She gasped, several times in quick sucession she had never heard anything like it, her face turned a bright bright red, as her eyes turned to look at him. She couldn't.. stand it, her lips found his, and she turned slightly more so that they could share a heated and passionate kiss.

"I hope.. that you'll do that again.. in the future."

She was slightly out of breath but she couldn't help it, there was something about him that made her blood boil, and something about the way he had just whispered in her ear, that made her want him so very badly. But she knew while they had crossed boundaries they weren't quite ready to jump into bed, at least she didn't think so.

“I…I’ve never had a good experience with it….any one whom I trusted enough to touch me has always betrayed me”
“I…I just wanted to stop getting hurt…so I gave up on it and letting people have that right to get close enough were they felt it was okay to touch me”

She smiled softly.

"I won't betray you." she swore to him then and there.

She loved the way his hands stroked over her body, she knew now that he felt attracted to her. Not only in a sexual sense but in a sense that he wanted her close, because the feelings that were developing between them were growing deeper by the moment. She touched his cheek softly, he couldn't understand how much that he really meant to her, it was hard for even her to describe.

"Any other questions?" she whispered softly as she snuggled back into him, his voice and her name whispering over and over in her mind.

[Josiah]

He heard her gasp as he whispered her name into her ear his eyes catching her cheeks turning completely red from his actions. He could not help but give a small grin, it was a bit of pay back and he was loving it. But his victory was short lived as she turned to him and kissed him passionately making him forget about her cheeks and focused on her lips. When it broke her words told him how clearly she lied her name if it was said in just the right way.

Soon she asked him if there were any other questions he had for her and he shook his head softly, there were more but he wanted to quite while they were ahead, some things would have to come in time, he was sure they each had their fair share of demons behind them but right now as she snuggled into him he knew those demons were at bay and could not touch them for this single moment in time, something he was sure neither of them felt to often.

“Well” he paused softly looking to her “I want to know one important thing” he said softly “When I’m done…will you help me to the bed and lay with me” he would wait till she asked what it was that needed to be done first before his lips would find hers again, while it was foreign and weird he had to admit that kissing, real kissing was some how very enjoyable.

This time it was his tongue that dove into her mouth, he was clearly taking a bit of control in his actions not looking for her to initiate a thing. As he made out with her Josiah felt it was time to atleast try some of the things he had been reading about. His books upstairs under his bed were all about things like fore play and love making, techniques and sensual parts of the female body and how to pleasure them.

The hand that had been on her silk clad hip moved upward, the position of her body giving him basically free range to touch what ever he wanted. His hand found her bust and began to grope and message the sucilant flesh of her mounds, using the silk that would rub up against her to his advantage. The hand that had been on her thigh becoming more active in its nature moving upward just slightly more his finger tips stroking and teasing the sensitive nerves he had read about which laid in regions of the inner thigh.

He was not sure he could make love or have sex yet, but he knew Siege, and she had been so caring to him these past days, dotting on him in his injuried state. He wanted her to feel good, to feel appreciated and he knew how much touch seemed to solidify these feelings for her. He was looking to turn her on, to give her a sensual release and let her fall back to sleep on the sofa bed in his arms the way she liked to. He wanted to give her these things because he knew he could, because he knew in the end his actions would make her feel special to him….though if she didn’t know it already she was already a very special person in his world

[Siege]

“When I’m done…will you help me to the bed and lay with me”

Her eyes rose curiously. She wasn't sure what he had in mind, but she would do whatever she could to make him as comfortable as possible.

"Of course, What do you want to do?" she asked.

Suddenly, he grabbed her and forced his lips down on hers. She was lost, all thoughts driven out of her mind as she moaned and kissed him back. He was kissing her heatedly, passionatly, it was a wondeful feeling afterall she had never expcted him to be so direct so soon. And yet, there were things yet to come. She felt his hands begin to move, and pleasure her, taking her body and playing it as though it was his violin. It didn't take that long, and yet it seemed like eternity that he played with her, taking what he must have larned from those books under his bed and making use of it. She had not felt so good in a long time, they got a great deal more physical before it was all over.

After that, she got them to the bed, and curled up in his arms, she figured they were both tired, but she was sated and very tired of course. She hadn't slept very long, and now that she felt completely happy she snuggled up into his arms, and smiled up at him as he held her close.

"I could get used to you holding me when I sleep." she whispered. "I could get used to you whispering my name, to touching me, and holding me, and being the man I care about so much."

She kissed him softly, their first goodnight kiss.

"Goodnight, baby."

With that, her eyes which had fought so hard to stay awake finally closed without opening again and she fell deeply asleep right beside him, curled up as much as she could into his arms. Unwilling to let go of her boyfriend.

[Josiah]

It didn’t take long but yet it didn’t seem to end all at the same time, as though they were frozen in their actions and had stopped time and all its constrictions and rules. Though all good things had to come to an end and when it did he could see the exhaustion in her eyes. She managed to get them to bed, he still needed her help though it was not as bad as before.

In bed she curled into him slinging to him. Speaking in whispers she told him things it was clear she was willing to embrace, things she wanted for them that she could look forward to getting used to. Before kissing him softly. He was tired from his surfing but still his eyes did not close right away even with her curling into him. “Good night” he whispered to her though her breathing had already changed.

Was this going to be him from now on? Was this going to lead him to his future? As he held her, his girlfriend these thoughts ran through his head. Some how they were terrifying yet calming and he had no idea what to make of it. His world, it was her fault it was changing, it was her fault that he knew it would crumble around him.

But in the end...was that a bad thing?

His eyes finally began to close. What was it he had to offer her? He had no idea. But as he began to drift off such thoughts became lost. He was moving forward, he was starting to live. And it was all thanks to her…..his girlfriend.