Wanna Play?? ( Gabriel )

[Kevala Badoer]

Tonight was not unlike many of the others that had gone by as of late. Kevala was home....alone...again...the twins asleep upstairs, and the entire house empty.

Wait.....

What???

Yes, even the security had been sent home. Why? Cause she had plans and well, her plans did not involve people watching her. Heh. Standing in her living room dressed in a simple black sweater, one that went all the way down to her mid thigh section. Tied up about the waist.

Her long black hair falling freely about her shoulders and the neck of the scarf pulled up. Yes, she was comfy...or so it seemed. She had called Gabriel...she needed to speak with him and well, she was tired of putting it off.

This was a personal thing, not what most people would think if they saw it, but then, people loved to ASSUME they knew what Kevala was all about. Heh. Nobody had a clue, not even Gabriel. But if she got her way he would find out tonight.

Settling back onto the couch she would sigh softly, eyes casting a glance up to the clock. Yes, he should be here soon. She had told him to be here 15 minutes ago. So yeah...he would be showing up anytime now.

[Gabriel Seran]

showing up at the door without the restrictions of security or anyone giving him gruff over little details Gabriel walked in the front door expecting another close meeting encounter, it seemed like a bumpy patch with Kev. He wondered how Katsuri dealt with it whilst in the relationship. Of course delving into that frame of thought Gabriel figured that it was probably better in than out. On the outside they simply played games watching as the other would fold or manage a frame of weakness. Fun but nonetheless still very cruel.

Walking in the door Gabriel paced his way towards the living room truly calm as he'd face her with a speculative glance. Why did they need to talk? It was rather useless when they could manage otherwise, no new developments had shifted their course he was rather perplexed by swift actions threatening to tear apart his skull.


"...yes?"

[Kevala Badoer]

Okay, so goal one: Get him here. Complete. Now onto goal number two. Get him to ease up some.

She would nod toward the chair across from her.

"Sit. Please..."

She did not wish to make him think she was trying to be controlling. That was the quickest way to one very defiant Gabriel. She knew that one. Instead she would give him a very soft and almost submissive little look.

Nothing harsh in her eyes. No, she was here with a purpose and upsetting him or getting him all uppity would not do to help in said purpose.

Brushing her tongue over her lips she would wait for him to take his seat. Assuming he would. Never could tell with that man.

[Gabriel Seran]

Gabriel took his time moving with purpose in a faint strike as he didn't take to Kevala's actions she seemed all too calm for what she was doing here, it rather put Gabriel on edge.

"Alright."

He'd sit carefully adjacent to her never letting his eyes shift for but a moment always focused.

(ooc: gah sorry crap post)

[Kevala Badoer]

She was calm. That was the truly strange part about this, even to her. She had her plan thought through and would do what she had to in order to achieve her goal for tonight. Speaking of which. Goal Two: Get him to sit. CHECK

She would then nod. Offering another soft smile toward him before she would shift, her bare feet shifting off of the couch and settling upon the carpeted floor as she gripped the edge of the couch lightly.

She would then push herself up to stand. Okay, so here is how this was going to go down.

She reached up, undoing the sash around her waist that held her sweater in place. Pushing the sweater off....leaving her standing there in something she hoped like hell would catch his fucking attention for awhile, though it was not the only weapon she had chosen for this night.

No, as her sweater fell away, her long raven locks falling in soft curls about her petite form, another item would be noticed upon her. Settled about her pretty little neck was a simple, black collar with a silver name plate on it in the front.

Still not done though. No. She would then simply lower herself down, settling upon her hands and knees and crawling the distance between them, hips rocking back and forth slowly with each move she made, until she was settled at his feet. Rising up to rest upon her knees as her hands came to rest upon her silky thighs.

Those eyes, casting a soft submissive look up to him as a few black locks fell down into her eyes. Though for now no motion was made to move them. The name plate on that collar she wore? Well give you two guess who's name was engraved upon it. Heh...Yeah...

Gabriel Seran

Now there are a lot of reasons people could assume she was doing this, but in all reality, it was not what people would think. Probably not even Gabriel.

For now, she said nothing...just settled there and looked at him. If she had to say she was surrendering to him completely then he was not the Gabriel Seran she knew and loved.

[Gabriel Seran]

Gabriel cocked a brow curiously observing the outfit with a serene bit of interest as she played the sexual little minx trying to get his attention with quite a get up. All things considered he would have loved to "play" with her using all that hidden lust and strength he'd gathered over the years. Cocking a grin he'd show his true state of mind that was until she'd offered the collar. A sense of mixed confusion, lust, and anger surged through him.

Yes he wanted control, he wanted to be just what his predecessors had failed to do before but like this was it worth such an extent he knew he had her full heart but to a point this was too far. Gabriel grimaced in pain like he swallowed the heart in his chest. Angrily he bit back fury exploding in his face.

A radiant surge of his Qi touched her now with his fingers streaming across her cheek softly.

"Why are you doing this? This hurts me you understand that...? I cannot see you like this, not as a slave not as my play thing."

Gabriel felt a snarl rise up but he suppressed it, "Do you know what you're doing to me, it's maddening."

[Kevala Badoer]

She felt it, but she did not move, she did not let his emotions affect her as they always did. She had spent so much time with him, been tied to him for so long now, her emotions fed off of his. But for tonight she fought it.

It would do no good for that to happen. She would lean slightly into his touch, unable to help herself. It was after all what she craved more than anything. Some may think she craved sex, or something of that nature, but then nobody knew Kevala for what she really was. Finally, once he spoke she would look back up to him, that same soft, calm and gentle look in her icy hues.

"No...I do not know what I do."

She spoke the truth. She did not know. She was so confused and lost half the time because he never told her...He never said outright what he felt and she understood that. She did not sit here tonight upon her knees for that.

"I only need to know something Gabriel. I need to know...What is so wrong with me that you would not dare think to love me?"

He knew that she understood he had another. So to argue that as his reason would be useless. She was seeking the true answer. What was wrong with her? If she knew, she could fix it. She had to fix it. All her life that is what she did. She sought out those defects people saw in her and fixed them.

She could not continue to be some monster. It was not a life she wanted to live.

[Gabriel Seran]

Gabriel closed his eyes briefly and breathed a deep sigh of regret that he'd pressed her so far as to think that anything he did was her fault to any other man this would have been perfect. Taking advantage of her confusion and hatred for herself. But truly deep down Gabriel was a different breed, not the man to take that which he'd created he'd take something out of stupidity or foolishness but it was not her fault. Everything was his to bear.

A hand cascaded down taking her face to look up at him.

"There is nothing wrong with you, not a damned thing you understand, in any other world I'd give everything I had for you my heart and my soul." Gabriel spoke truthfully from the bottom of his heart.

"But we live in a world where I cannot, I cannot bear my soul because I vowed it to another, I made a promise to her that I'd change the world even costing my life and that has taken my very soul from me. I am barren."

[Kevala Badoer]

She looked up at him as his hand willed it, his emotions again hitting her and again she shot them down. No, she was not that weak. She was stronger than this. She could handle anything he said. She really could.

Or so she thought......

Those eyes tearing over at his words as she jerked her head away from him. The first act of defiance she had ever given him. And honestly that killed her to do such. Literally, her chest hurt from such an act.

But why did he still lie to her? It was her. She knew that......a soft almost whimpered sound escaping her, though it was barely able to be heard as a single tear broke loose and slid down her delicate face.

Her words coming out in nothing but a mere breathless whimper as she struggled to regain herself.

"i...am a monster...."

She shook her head and pushed herself away from him. Fine! He did not want to tell her. She could not force him.

Turning about so that her back was to him as she drew her knees up to her chest. Seated there upon the floor....

Then he continued, and she felt the truth of his words..but..that did not make it any easier.

Lowering her head to rest upon her knees she would speak softly once he was done....The mention of him dying having caused something inside her to shatter.

"i will die without you...you know this right?"

She fought back more tears as she drew in a shakey breath, her small form trembling as she sat there.

"i understand you have given so much to everyone.....it was just my luck to come along to late.....i....i see that you do not need me...that ....."

She stopped...unable to continue......truth in her own words. Every last one of them.

[Gabriel Seran]

it hurt to just sit there and let her suffer but he could not bring himself to save her, he was by no means someone's hero, he was the martyr meant to suffer not her she was stealing his guilt, his burden. Everything he wanted she'd taken and in that sense she owned everything left of him that was still human and it killed him inside to have that taken. It destroyed him and left the man crippled but a shell.

Gabriel stood from his chair standing over her like an ominous tower overshadowing her with much power and knowledge, but it all meant nothing when he had lost everything keeping him human. His eyes grew weak, his body frail and cold to the world and he was as he should be, but another tool to the grand scheme.

"I'm sorry Kevala, that burden is not yours to take, for I am the monster, neigh I am your demon."

Gabriel said in a cold voice turning away with a cold expression out of her door and out of her life till she was ready to accept him as something he'd always intended to be. A true savior and hero.

(ooc: 2600 Post!!!)

[Kevala Badoer]

She would whimper softly as he stood to leave...she caught the emotions, she knew he was leaving...for good.....she heard it in his words and she died....

She had given everything to him....and....he left...like everyone else.....

Tears fell from her eyes as she struggled to get up..struggled to get to her room.....which yeah...that was a freaking journey in itself.........

_________________________________

It had been several hours......and she was curled up on her floor....wearing a pair of sweats and a t-shirt..her black hair falling about her face.....stuck to her cheeks from the tears she had cried...

Sweety..please...rethink this...You knew he would do this. You knew it all along....Do not do this to yourself.

Please do not do this. Do not think these things. You are strong, you can find another. One who will love you.

She ignored the soft tone of the voices. Trying to comfort her. She was not there....her mind was empty.....just as the rest of her was....

Finally, she would move....pushing herself up, managing to make it to her feet, though honestly the mere effort of that seemed wasted to her. No point in even moving, in even......

breathing.......................

That was when it became clear how to make the hurt go away. How to stop it all and to never have to suffer from the loss of another simply because she fucked it up. She could do nothing right. She pushed him away, she had done this..........

NO MORE!

Shaking her head as the voices began to scream in her head, she pushed them back. Black eyes looking over the room as it filled with brokenness and despair. It hung thick in the air, stifling any other form of emotion that dared to try and enter this room.

She could not do this anymore.

Moving to the door to her room, fighting back the pain in her head as the voices continued to fight against her she would scream out at them. Not caring that it was out loud anymore. Who the fuck cared!!!!

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!!! I DO NOT NEED YOU ANYMORE! AT LEAST LET ME DIE IN PEACE!"

And for the first time in her life.........there was silence.

Finally reaching the door, she entered her code, and then her reset code...changing the code to open the door.

She would then slam it shut. Sealing herself inside she would then move to the phone. Picking it up and calling the nanny. She gave her a very clear message. To keep the twins and when Spike returned home tell him that she wished for him to raise them.

They would have a good life with Spike and his family. It was the best she could do for them.

She then hung up and would go into the bathroom. Heh...funny, the last time she almost died was in this very room. White tile everywhere. She could remember the blood all over the floor. Remember the pain.....

But it was nothing compared to what she felt now. No, she would rather suffer that pain a million times over than what she felt now. She would never forgive herself. She was a monster and he had left her. The one thing in this life she had truly loved besides her children and she had pushed him away.

Opening up the medicine cabinet, she would pull out her razor, the one she had not used in so very long.....Because....G....Gab...She could not even think his name without feeling as though a knife was being run through her heart......

She shook her head, falling down onto the cold tile floor as she heard the sound she had been expecting. Ivan beating on the door. He was her little puppy....following her everywhere.....but he would be free of that burden soon enough...

She did not think twice about what she was to do, instead she did the thing she had done so many times before. She cut....only this time, it was two straight, deep wounds down her wrists......The blood pouring forth as she dropped the razor to the floor.

Her arms falling down to her sides as she felt the life draining from her. Her mind running over that which had led her here. No, she would not hurt anymore......

A loud crash....almost like some type of explosion, sounded, though by that point she was fading and could only assume it was her mind breaking down...........

Eyes falling closed...............................


Darkness................................................................................