What's outside my door... (Marcus)

[Silk Sanada]

To say Silk hadn't been herself would be an understatement. To recap, she lost touch with a guy she liked, Kazuya. He kinda did his thing and she did her own. They grew apart as friends often do. Her attention would focus on other guys she knew, though more as trying to make friends and piece herself together. Among the people she met, there was a man named Kiyoshi. They hung out, talked about her joining the Crows and even about her getting her strip club started. Of course... this was all before hell broke lose.

Silk has never been good at dealing with Chaos unless she's the one causing it. So when everything with Barker hit the fan and caused a ton of destruction, she did what she could to help Marcus keep the compound going. She didn't venture outside it, mostly because she couldn't take what lay outside the compound walls. The sights and sounds bothered her. Death in general made the silver haired vixen uneasy. Time went on and things just kept getting worse outside the walls of her compound, till one day... the fight was brought inside.

Silk ended up watching Kiyoshi get his brains splattered all over Marcus, despite her fighting spirit, that rattled her greatly. She never killed anyone, not that it wasn't something she could do. If you got her mad enough she'd do it in a heart beat and not even have a speck of remorse, but... she was never good with people she knew, no matter how brief, dying. It seemed her life was full of it. Mother and father first, then her sister, then her grandmother, then a lot of her high school friends and now as an adult, she really couldn't take it.

After that, she became even more focused on not leaving the compound. She feared meeting new people and feared losing them. Most of all she feared the loss of Marcus as he was the only constant in her life aside from her pets. Bandit and Aiko protected the compound as well as any guard dog or viscous beast would and they continued even more so as they saw Silk was so rattled by the events unfolding around her.

Despite all the fight and fiery spirit the woman carried, a man believed using her for bait to get to Marcus was a smart idea. Silk was weakened already by the loss of Kiyoshi and so she was easily caught off guard and kidnapped. Of course, Marcus came to her rescue. Both him and the kidnapper believed she was knocked out while they fought but the reality was, she witnessed most of the fight.

She struggled and tried to get free but in the end, all she got to witness was her best friend, her only tether to the world, nearly lose his life trying to save her because she had become the one thing she hated most. Weak. It was a word that shouted over and over in her mind. She hated herself beyond belief and watching Marcus try to protect her, nearly losing his life in the process... it tossed her over the edge.

Oh sure, Marcus survived and was able to bring her home, but she'd never be the same. She'd lost that fire, the sass and herself. Everything had taken such a toll on her. Post Traumatic Stress was something mostly reserved for those in a war. Silk was now counted among them, couple that disorder with crippling depression and you would get the ball of mush you see before you.

Today, Silk sat in her home in the compound. Before everything she would at least go outside, but now... now she didn't even go into the backyard. Marcus had to work hard to even get her to sit in the living room. For the first week or so, he worked on getting her to eat again. Even when he managed that... she wouldn't eat much. Then he worked to get her to leave her bed, to leave her room and to eventually walk around the house.

Although that seemed like so much progress, Silk refused to go outside. She always became distraught watching Marcus leave and upon his return held onto him like she thought he was never coming back. She sat at a chair beside the window and would just stare for hours at her backyard. Right now, Aiko and Bandit ran around playing with each other outside like everything was safe and normal. She watched them, it always hurt her to see them out there. The fear of losing them often made her want to lock them in her room but... Marcus had kept her from doing that.

He had been her small thread of sanity. He had taken up the roll of her caretaker and did what ever he could to try and get her back to normal. Every now and again, he'd try to coax her outside but lately he hadn't been. She figured he must have given up. She didn't go about keeping up her silver haired appearance much. She in fact had let a lot of the silver grow out and now most of her hair was its natural dark brown/blackish color with long silver tips. She never wore her contacts anymore so her brown eyes were visible now. The fire that used to be lit behind them seemed almost totally gone. Replaced with a fear and a sadness no one could possibly imagine seeing in her.

Marcus saw it, quite a bit. When ever he went to leave or when ever he tried to get her to do something out of her comfort zone, he would get the saddest puppy dog look ever. Bandit and Aiko try to cheer her up too, constantly giving her affection, trying to get a smile from her, but they rarely get what they seek. She has become meek and quiet, but they hope someday soon, the real Silk will return.

Till she did return, the current one, sat waiting for Marcus to return home. She was dressed in her Pajamas. Hair was left falling around her shoulders in a messy heap and her brown eyes stared out the window as she sat in silence.

[Marcus Prasad]

It was kind of surprising how easily one could make a meal out of tomatoes. Cut a single one into thick slices, Slap a few slices of cheese on top and fry it for alittle while on a skillet and BAM!

Instant Breakfast!

As Silk Sat at the window contemplating the deeper meanings of the cracked glass, Marcus fussed about the Kitchen like an old maid, doing his best to keep chipper as he whistled an old tune his mother always had when she went about doing those things mothers always did. He hated seeing her like this. Hated seeing her so despressed and forlorn as if she had lost all hope in the world, Breaking his heart with how tragic it was to see a Woman who was usualy so full of fire devolve into a mopey, sad mess.

All his previous attempts to break her out of her shell had failed, though he WAY making progress. This time though, he was sure he had a secret weapon to jumpstart the young spanish woman.
A cute fluffy Secret Weapon named Brenner.

"Aaaaaaand Breakfast is DONE!~"
Marcus chimed in a sing songy tone as he slid a few cheesey tomatoe slices off the skillet and onto her plate before bringing it over to her with a fork and knife.
"Something my mom thought of. Tell me watchu think."

[Silk Sanada]

It used to be Silk who was noisy as hell, now it was Marcus. He was always noisy but it seemed he had gotten more so to try and make up for the lack of her being noisy. The silence when he wasn't home was almost deafening, but when he was around, you might have wished to be deaf.

Silk would take the plate, not so much as a word being uttered to her friend. This was how it usually went. She would be very quiet all day, only occasionally speaking. She walked the plate to the dinner table and set it down, then walked back to bring her chair back to the table. She had become accustomed to eating at the table rather than where ever she sat. She would stare at the tomatoes for a while. Her fork gently poking at them. Her brown eyes down cast.

She still had trouble looking at Marcus. When she looked, sometimes she had flashes of his face bruised and beaten. It scared her and she didn't like seeing it. The woman who never feared anything, feared everything now. It would be a while, of her just staring at the food before she began to cut it up to eat. She knew that Marcus wanted her to eat, despite her lack of appetite. She had lost some weight, from lack of eating, though was gaining it back due to Marcus pushing the food.

She would take a bite, and glance over to Marcus. Her sad eyes only resting on him long enough for her to nod her head a little in acknowledgement that it was good. She went to look away and back to her plate just as the flash of him beaten and bloody flicked into her vision. She closed her eyes quickly and turned her face back downward to the plate. Her hands trembled lightly as she tried to push it from her mind.

It probably shouldn't be sticking with her like this, but it was. The human mind was an enigma and things that most people got over so easily, could be others undoing. She felt like she was losing it. Like she was getting crazier day by day the longer this continued. Why hadn't Marcus just let her go? It was a thought that occurred often. Though... she knew the answer. He didn't let her go for the same reason she wouldn't have. She would take a few more delicate bites of the breakfast, making sure not to look at him again for fear of that imagery returning.

Bandit and Aiko would strut into the house and look up at Marcus as if asking about Silk's progress today. The feline had grown attached to Marcus and now most of his evil antics were limited to harmless pranks. He would rub himself against Marcus' leg purring, knowing the man was doing all he could to restore his owner. Aiko copied the cat, despite being a fox, and rubbed herself against Marcus' other leg while making some weird fox sound that seemed like she had wanted to imitate the cat's purring. This was normal though. Both pets would come in and give Marcus affection as thank yous for all he was doing.

[Marcus Prasad]

As Silk ate, Marcus took a moment to give her a look over, making sure she was at least trying to take care of herself. Her weight was looking better at least. It was heartbreaking to see her go from curvy and athletic to careworn and skinny in the span of a few months. As long as he kept her eating and drinking she would be healthy.

But it was her mind he was more worried about.

Like Marcus, Silk was the kind of person who could handle any hardhsip thrown at them in stride. Unfortunatly that made them very vulnerable to threats against things that were not in thier direct control like Family and friends.

Or a city.

He knew how she felt. He could remember the anger than nearly got him killed at seeing her tied up, beaten and helpless. As she became more protective of him, so to had he become protective of her. At first he was happy to have her stay at the compound and never leave. Thing was he could also tell how miserable she had become and decided to do whatever he could to break her out of her shell. It required patience though, a heavy amount of patience and perserverance as Silk always had been a tough nut to crack even when she was all in one piece in the head.

Reaching out, he brushed aside some errant strands of hair from her face in a surprisingly intimate gesture. Having to take care of the young woman for months now in between running Anaheim city had drawn him close to her. For all the times he would go around listening to peoples problems, he never really had anyone to listen to his own. Once Silk became listless, he would try to get a reaction out of her by talking about his day, how he felt and how he felt about others. The woman would know more about the inner workings of his brain that anyone else in the world.

Feeling Bandit rub up against his leg, Marcus reached down to pick his newfound ally in the war against Silks Deppression up and deposted him atop of the table before giving him a scratch behind the ears.

"Well Dr. Bandit. She likes it, that's a start Unfortunatly there hasn't been much cha-"
Suddenly he looked back down to see Aiko rubbing against his leg and making what almost sounded like a Purr. Reaching down, Marcus scooped Aiko up and held the cute little fox before him.
"I dont think I've EVER heard you purr before. C'mon Aiko your a fox, not a kitteh."
He teased before taking a seat beside Silk and plopping the little fox onto his lap.

[Silk Sanada]

Silk had gotten used to Marcus brushing her hair out of her face, fixing some clothing malfunctions like a spaghetti strap falling down or her pajama pants not being tied properly. He took care of her and she had become use to these rather intimate gestures. They weren't exactly things most guys did even while dating someone. Still, he was trying to keep her together. She could appreciate that. She'd do the same for him.

Due to her lack of talking, Marcus now came to confide in her. Silk had become a really good listener at least. It seemed her best friend took too much onto his shoulders sometimes. She wanted to be out helping him. She knew he probably needed her out there doing something, she just couldn't bring herself to go. After some really hard days, when he came home she was glad to see him. They would sit and she would rest her head on him as he talked. It was just how it went now. He needed someone there for him and Silk was always and would always be that person.

She could hear him speaking to Bandit and a gentle smirk tugged at her lips. It was hidden behind her hair but it was there. Bandit would stick his head up under her hair and right into her line of view. He'd meow at her and paw at the edge of her plate trying to urge her to eat more. Aiko continued her purrs and gave Marcus affection like she always did.

Silk decided today... she'd finish what he gave her. He had been doing this every day. Cooking, trying to get her to eat and more often than not, she would eat half, maybe less. When she finished the last tomato, Bandit seemed quite happy and meowed at Marcus as if to tell him she had finished.

"It was very good Marcus. Thank you."

Her voice was hushed as it wasn't used as much as it once was.

[Marcus Prasad]

"Hey, No problem."
He answered, heart swelling with hope. She rarely spoke these days so Marcus took it as a good sign every time she did. Though to be honest he took it as a good sign whenever she did ANYTHING other than mope and stare at stuff.

For awhile he just let the silence drag on for abit, scratching Aiko behind the ears before he cleared his throat.
"You know, I was thinking It's been awhile since you got out and had some fresh air. Up for a walk around the compound? You'll end up getting sick if you stay cooped up in here much longer. Not to mention what the lack of exercise if doing to you. You're wasting away Silk. Its....."

Marcus stopped for a moment and sighed, reaching up to massage the bridge of his nose as that cold chill of fear, fear for his closest and dearest friend gripped his heart once more.
"It's Scaring me. You're Scaring me. This just isn't healthy you know?"

[Silk Sanada]

Silk sat there, silent as always. Once again, Marcus started the same request he always did. A walk around the compound and as usual, it took the same turn, from concern to what sounded almost like annoyance. He had said it a million times before and even though it was said differently, it was all the same in the end. He wanted the old Silk back. The one who laughed in the face of danger and charged everything and anything with out thinking things through.

The woman who when they first met, took risks and continued to take them over and over and over. He missed who she was. Silk could understand. She missed the old her as well. Still, the woman sat there, silent and staring at the empty plate before her. Before all the bad, before Silk changed, she would have jumped up, shouted and defended herself. Now, there sat a shadow of her former self. A shell... and it seemed nothing more.

Bandit would reach out and getting angry at her himself, his paw swiped at her and for the first time ever, his claws were drawn. He scratched her cheek with a loud hiss. Silk didn't even flinch or blink. Her hair shifted and swayed before settling back to the way it was. Quietly, she stood. Bandit stared at her wondering what the consequence for his actions would be.

She grasped her chair and moved it back to the window with out a word spoken. Bandit slumped onto the table in defeat. Silk would finally speak. "Don't you think I hate feeling this way..." She asked, her voice hushed and monotone. "Every time you go outside... I see it all over again..." She sat down in her chair. "You died Marcus."

That was her fear. His death. The death of people she cared for. "You died... and I couldn't... I couldn't do anything." Her monotone voice altered. There was a tremble. It was unsure where it would lead. "You died, Kiyoshi died, Leon died...I can't save any of you. I can't... I can't protect any of you..." Her voice cracked. "I don't like when you leave. When you go out there... I don't know if you will come back."

Then there was silence. It was the most she had said in a long time and if she spoke any more, she'd lose control. She'd break. She'd do the one thing she HATED doing and the one thing she was terrified of doing. Cry. It would just write it in stone, that she had become weak. She closed her eyes and swallowed down lumps of tears and sat there, looking out into the yard once more.

[Marcus Prasad]

Deep down Marcus wanted to get angry. In fact he could feel the beast inside pulling at its chains in response to Silks attitude. To see her so pitiful and melancholy was almost more than he could bear. The old Silk was the living personification of Wild Fire. Bright, unpredictable, full of life.

Dangerous.

The complete and utter opposite of the sad sack wretch before him. Now Marcus could very well understand how she felt. Fact of the matter was, much of his obsession with becoming strong in the first place has it's roots firmly planted in the desire to protect and defend all of his loved ones.

"You Burying me before I'm even dead now?"
Marcus asked, his tone stern as he rose to his feet and moved to where Silk was sitting, standing behind her with his arms crossed.
"Kiyoshi? Yeah, dead. Leon too, but he came back somehow."
He would calmly explain despite the urge to shake her until her brains rolled back into their proper place in her skull. For the first few weeks he had felt nothing but the deepest sympathy for her, but as time went on sympathy quickly morphed into impatience. Stepping around to her front, he would lean his rear against the windowsill, looming overtop of her.
"And the last time I checked, I killed that cocky mutherfucker. So who killed who exactly?"

Still, he was not entirely without feeling. Hearing her come so close to breaking now made his heart bleed for her. Reaching out, he would take her chin in his hand and pull her chin up so that she would be forced to look him in the eyes. He would speak again though this time with a much softer voice.
"Remember what I said my first day here? I said that I will always be here. There will always be me. Look, you lost some people, I get that. Fuck, everyone from Long beach to Anaheim have a sob story just as bad, if not worse. Question is, are you gonna keep sitting around here with your thumb up your butt or are you going to finally get up and do something about it?"

Letting go of her chin, the man would begin to fuss about the kitchen some more, collecting a few things and stuffing them into his pockets.
"Now I need to step out for abit to check on our newest addition to the Wolfpack so go get changed cause I want you to come with me this time."
He said firmly in a tone that made it clear he would NOT accept no for an answer.

[Silk Sanada]

Once again Silk locked herself away in silence. Part of her believed not facing him would keep her from getting more upset but Marcus was always Mr. Fix it. He stepped in front of her continuing his some what insensitive sounding comments. It was getting on her nerves. She had spent most of her life being strong, pretending the death of the ones she loved didn't bother her. She pretended pain, the loss of children, the end of her marriage, all hadn't gotten to her. Sure she had a bit of moping after the divorce but it wasn't this bad and she moved on despite still feeling upset over how that had turned out. Wasn't she aloud to be upset? Wasn't she aloud to be sad and depressed? Did she always have to pretend that nothing got to her?!

Then his voice softened and she felt him take her chin in his hand. She still couldn't bring herself to look up at him. Her brown eyes would remain down-cast as he spoke. It started out sounding caring and ended on another insensitive note. Once again she found herself questioning why she wasn't aloud to be sad like everyone else. Why was it so impossible for Silk to have any other feelings beside anger!? He would let her go and walk off to the kitchen leaving Silk to sit in her quiet world. She thought that would be it, that she would be left to stew and sit on his words like always.

It wasn't. Mr. Fix it went ahead and made a demand. Okay, so he didn't SAY "I demand you..." but the words and the tone he took with her. It was almost like he had forgotten who he was talking to. This was Silk, sure she might not have been threatening him or being a total tease but you would think he would talk to her better than that. For all the time he's known her you would think he would know better than to say THOSE words in THAT tone. Though it seemed he didn't and Silk's eye twitched. Despite the woman being sad, she was at her very core, stubborn.

Even with her back to him, he could see her arms draw up and fold in that "Fuck you, I'm not moving way." He'd seen her do it plenty of times when she wasn't all mopey and she felt its meaning didn't change now that she was. "No." Her only reply. Normally, non-depressed Silk would have stood up and ripped him a new one. Still, he'd gotten more words from her today than any day before. If he turned away now, no doubt he'd consider it progress. Right? Cause really... why push someone you KNOW would hurt you if you kept nit picking them. After all, someone can only hear the same "stop being a sad sack" talk before they wanna club you to death for not letting them be a sad sack.

Marcus was pushing his limit...

[Marcus Prasad]

By this point a furious Silk would have been preferable to the alternative he was being forced to deal with right now. Naturally there was nothing wrong with grieving or needing time away to deal with ones emotions, but Silk had gone beyond that and allowed herself to be caught up in a whirlpool of Self pity.

"Fuck you say."
Marcus snarled back at her. His self control beginning to fray at the edges.
"It's about time you joined the rest of the human race Chiquita, Your Pity party is now officially over. You ARE coming out with me even if it means I have to Drag you kicking and screaming to your room, strip you naked and change you myself! I mean Jesus CHRIST woman, You've spent more time locked up in this house than you have anywhere else since I got here! First for that fucking Book of yours and now this?"

Marcus would then come back around and step infront of her and by the look on his face, he meant business.
"Now are we going to do this the easy way, or the hard way?"

[Silk Sanada]

And here we go ladies and gentlemen, unstoppable force vs. immovable object! Marcus snapped at her but Silk didn't uncross her arms or flinch. When he continued snapping and even moved in front of her to give the "I mean business" look, she would just turn her head. "I didn't stutter. I said NO. N-O. N to the fucking O. Fuck is it that hard for you to understand?!" Her voice raised. Le gasp! A while emotion has appeared! "I don't know who the fuck died and named you my father but I don't have to listen to you. You aren't my fucking dad!" She snapped still keeping her arms crossed and her head turned away.

By this time, both Bandit and Aiko were watching. Bandit stared in amazement as it seemed Marcus had finally done it. The real Silk began to come through. Even if it was just her raising her voice. Considering the woman hadn't said anything in a long time that was one hell of an accomplishment. Bandit would have to remember to bring Marcus a dead bird later as a reward.

[Marcus Prasad]

Marcus would stand there, weathering Silks sudden Tirade with a stoic expression. When she was finally finished, he would leer down at her and simply say offhand.
"Ah. Hard way then."
Before lunging at Silk, grabbing hold of her and throwing her over his shoulder before making his way over to her room.

[Silk Sanada]

She honestly thought he wouldn't. She didn't know why she thought he wouldn't, by all possible reasoning, it should have been something she saw coming. After all, she had known him long enough to have seen it coming. When he lunged at her, Silk didn't even move. She was actually in shock over this. The next thing the spanish woman knew she was tossed over his shoulder and being walked off to her room.

That was every man's dream wasn't it? Tossing Silk over their shoulder and going off to a bedroom with her? Well... maybe not now. Not with how she looked now. It took her a moment, almost like a slow starting computer but Silk began to kick and squirm. "Marcus don't you fucking dare! Put me the fuck down!" She shouted slamming her weak fists into his back. Her punches even showed how weak she'd become.

Bandit and Aiko ran ahead and pushed the bedroom door open. Her pets were actually aiding Marcus in his attempt to bring Silk back.

[Marcus Prasad]

"You know what pisses me off the most? The fact that if our roles were reversed you would have been screaming at me to grow a pair of balls by this point?"
Marcus fired back in a chillingly calm voice.
"I gave you your space to grieve as you needed but enough is enough! Plenty of people out there lost more than you have even before the bombs dropped and the majority of them were quite capable of pulling themselves together!"

Stepping into Silks room and narrowly avoided a pile of dirty clothes, Marcus closed and locked the door one handed before flinging Silk onto the bed. Looking around the room was depressing in the extreme as Silk had done nothing to maintain it, let alone herself.
"Way I see it, You were never one for the Gentle touch. Bandit? A Shirt and Skirt for the lady please?"
He didn't want to do this. Oh aye, he fantasized about it often enough, tearing the clothes off of her body and flinging them to the floor, smelling her sweet scent as thier bodies intertwined.

But not like this.
As Marcus pinned her down gently but firmly with one hand he began to pull her shirt over her head with the other. All the while it didn't escape his notice how much this looked like rape.
And the realization of this shook him to his very core.
But he knew it needed to be done. Silk needed a catalyst to shake her out of her depression.
It was just a shame that the first step would require such humiliation.

[Silk Sanada]

Some might have seen her shut down as totally unnecessary. At least, it seemed Marcus did. It was a way she was dealing with things as of late and he missed her old way of dealing with things. He was right though, if it had been him, she'd have done what ever was needed to bring him back. However, Silk was more of a ticking time bomb than Marcus had thought. She bottled things up, it was how she got through and how she seemed like she was so strong. When things over flowed, she shut down. It was how it worked. Her shut downs could last a while as she tended to bury a lot. He was trying to force her to wake up but it seemed all he was really doing was forcing her to go boom.

She would struggle with Marcus not even because he was stripping her clothes from her, but because she didn't like being forced into doing ANYTHING. Silk wasn't even bothered by the stripping all that much. It wasn't like Marcus wanted anything from her, but he did demand that she go outside and she was against that vehemently. "I swear to god Marcus! If you don't stop...!" She shouted as she squirmed and fought him. It was sad, she didn't have much strength any more compared to him. There was a time when she would have clobbered him but now... she had become so weak physically that she couldn't even push him away.

As thick headed as she was, this realization struck a cord with her. Meanwhile, Aiko and bandit were grabbing her clean clothes from her dresser and tossing them about to find something that might fit her. She still needed to put on more weight to get back to her healthy self but they figured that would come after everything was fixed. Bandit would Jump on the bed in one of Silk's long skirts and Aiko hopped up with one of her tank tops in her muzzle. They handed them over to Marcus just as there was a click from under Silk's Pillow.

The click was a switch blade. It was something she slept with now, after she had been kidnapped. Both pets jumped on her hands and bit into her wrists to keep her from using it. With an infuriated scream Silk would finally simmer down under them and Marcus. As she calmed she realized what she had almost done. The switchblade was dropped back onto her bed as a scared look flashed over her face. She had almost tried to cut Marcus. Sure, she used to joke about things like that but... it scared her. What had happened to her mind? Where had she gone? Aiko and Bandit kept their teeth in her wrists waiting for Marcus to finish dressing her.