Post by Kyrie Blaze on Dec 30, 2013 18:37:56 GMT -8
The waves pushed and pulled the blonde towards the beach. Red-rimmed blue eyes stared up at the night sky above her. She was tired. Tired of fighting for things that were too good to be true. Tired of fighting the water. The surf pushed her higher and set her down gently upon the sand, the wet mass twining into her hair, clinging to and coating the strands.
Kyrie took a shuddered breath as she watched the moon pass behind the clouds. She wasn't aware how much time had passed since she plunged into the dark waters that had been broken by moon and starlight. Now, with the clouds eating away at both, she could only watch the light of the moon be greedily swallowed by the clouds. Hyperion and Themis' words crossed her mind.
Her breath heaved out, leaving her ribs protesting more than they had in the past two weeks.
But it was the emotional pain that killed her. The physical pain, like the moon itself, was pale in comparison to the bright and burning sun. The physical pain she could bear.
The emotional pain made her consider leaving.
It would let them be so they could grow together without her being there as a constant reminder. She would avoid them, anyway, aside from official - inescapable - duty. Writhing to twist her body on the sand, resting her cheek on the grainy surface, the blonde looked towards the restored lights. The promise of a normal life glowed, there. Tears swelled in her eyes again. Was she even fit for that? Was she worthy? Could she lay down her arms, dig another grave and lay her warrior-self to rest?
Had she not done enough to have earned some sort of rest? To retain some small fragment of all her scattered hope that she could have a normal life? A family if she ever trusted her heart to someone again? Maybe she would adopt and foster some of the children all this turmoil had left abandoned. She didn't need lover or husband for that much.
But then...she would be abandoning her family. The thought filled her with a depth of terror and anguish that went deeper than her current heartbreak. Not by a huge amount, but enough that she could see...she didn't need Strike's promise to foster and raise children if she so desired in the future. But she did need her family.
That was an absolute truth she couldn't deny. And if they fell, she would go with them.
There were other bonds, of course. Her oath to Mathew, her responsibilities. Her positions were not handed to her willy-nilly, but ones she earned, and it would be shameful to hurtle them back into the faces of those that trusted her with them. But the most simple of them all was a bond of deep and abiding love for her Dragonkin. Her family that held all the pieces of her heart, however broken. It was that bond that would get her to stay above all the others that bound her by duty, even though staying was also very painful at present. The tears came again as she curled in on herself and shook, shivering with silent sobs.
Kyrie didn't know how much longer had passed. But it was still dark, though the East - from what she could see - held the faintest tinge of light. With a hiccup, she grunted and forced herself to her feet.
Because she had to get up. She had to push forward.
Even if forward meant to cry some more. To find a safe place to rest and pass out, perhaps. One person she thought of...because she had things she needed to say and discuss and ask. He was, despite it all, a man she thought of as her father, though he'd proven he could rip her heart out just as easily as anyone else. As dangerous as he was...she needed his grounded strength.
But she wasn't ready to face him just yet.
So she walked along the beach with the clouds rolling overhead. The moon peeked out as she wandered away from the distant lights that promised normality and stepped toward family, battle, heartache, and the extraordinary.
. o O ( Wordcount: 708. Part of the Monthly Event for December 2013. 2/3 )