On My Own (Josiah)

[Josiah]

She said that he had a nice ass?...why the hell was she looking at his ass? He shook his head lightly as he drove, so she wanted him in casual clothing, he doubted it would happen. He liked the way he dressed and it was oddly very comfortable and worked very well for the way that he lived. He didn’t answer her at first letting his head mull it over before he could give her a definitive no.

She went on to tell him about how she worked at a music store at the mall and that it was one of the only places that would hire her to to her appearance. He understood it, it was probably why he dressed the way he did to make sure he did not stand out or try and be unique, the better he faded away, the more conservative he dressed the more he could be over looked .

“I think if I just said classical your die laughing” Josiah said his eyes could see the mall in the distance now as they were approaching it. “I’m a fan of the Rat Pack and other things you’d probably wind up calling me pop for..” He said with a small sigh, the world had lost its taste in true music long ago and relied on noise for the past 2 decades.

“As you’re your clothing question….I am promising nothing” He siad leaving it with a definitive maybe as far as the subject was concerned.

He soon made the turn for the final entry into the mall…their little trip ready to begin

[Siege]

“I’m a fan of the Rat Pack and other things you’d probably wind up calling me pop for..”

Siege chuckled. She loved hanging out with him, and nw that he was opening up it was making it even better. He was joking around, and se new there was a smile forthcoming one of these days and it would likely shock her into speechlessness when she actually got to see one.

"It isn't my fault you act two decades older than you actually are." she teased him.

She knew they were gettng close, and her eyes found the mall soon enough. And they began to turn into the road that encircled the mall allowing travel around the large building in it's own circuit of stop signs and suicidal interesections.

“As you’re your clothing question….I am promising nothing”

Siege's lips moved into a bright huge grin as her eyes looked over at him with a bright smile. She punched his arm playfully.

"Good, I'll help you pick some stuff out. I'd pay a lot of cash, or silence if you'd prefer to see your ass in some jeans."

The car came to a stop and she hopped out not figuring whe would nor waiting for him to open the door for her, there was no need for it. She got out and closed the door behind her, and waited for him to come around the car. Her hand came out and clasped the edge of his sleeve right where it met the cuff, and held it, so they could be in contact but without actual touch.

"So.. I'm assuming that you're going to try to get me some clothes that aren't my normal style." she mused as they walked togeether towards the entrance.

[Josiah]

She punched his arm playfully, he had no idea what was the big deal about jeans and a tee shirt, they were actually very constricting and did not flow as easily as his slacks and button down shirts but that was just one of his ways of justifying why they weren’t good not even for fighting. Soon they got out of the car standing the the parking lot she grabbed his shirt by its sleeve which made his brow rose slightly, she really had a thing for holding people as though they were going to run away from her.

They began to walk to the entrance as she spoke his eyes looking to her they were still so cold but their chill was not actually directed at her, no it was not nearly as piercing as that.

“What do you mean try…..your getting nothing but brightly colored patterned sundresses and pants suits” He said though form the way his eyes looked to her it looked as though those cold red orbs of his were laughing.

“You know its your call as to the clothes you chose….just get the thought of dragging me around for underthings out of your head.” He sighed realizing something “Then again…screw it….if I don’t see them on the racks your probably just gunna make sure I see them on you at home” his head turned to her “Unless your willing to tell me otherwise”

[Siege]

“What do you mean try…..your getting nothing but brightly colored patterned sundresses and pants suits”

Siege, cocked her brow. Looking up at him. His eyes slid to the side and looked down at her, making her blush. There was actual humor in his eyes, dancing there behind the red orbs, it was so clos to a smile it was insane. She couldn't help but blush at that look, she loved to see him happy and open. He was getting there, and she knew that one day he would smile and she couldn't wait to be there.

"Sure pops, and we'll get your ratty swim trunks and wife beaters to replace your current residence in Dudsville."

She was holding onto his shirt. Because she figured he wouldn't want to hold her hand. And he was surprisingly close to the nailhead there. She didn't want to be abandoned again. She couldn't stand the thought of losing the only friend she had made so far. The only one that seemed to accept her as she was already. And she was afraid that he would run off without her, deciding she wasn't worth it.

“You know its your call as to the clothes you chose….just get the thought of dragging me around for underthings out of your head.”

“Then again…screw it….if I don’t see them on the racks your probably just gunna make sure I see them on you at home”

She laughed.

"Well, it isn't like I'm going to run into your room and give you a fashion show. But we do live in the same house, and yes you'll probably see them from time to time. So you might as well come along." she shrugged.

The automatic doors opened for them, and togetheer they stepped into the air conditioned building. her eyes quickly took in where they were, since there were many entrances to the mall. Her hand continued to hold onto the sleeve of his shirt, unwilling to let go yet unless he decided to take her hand.

"Alright, so.. where shall we start.. O.. MY.. GOD..."

Her eyes widened. MUSIC STORE!!! Not just any music store, oh no, there was a set of bright lime green drums in the window with chrome finish. Her eys were large, alight with excitement, and the hand on his shirt tighted slightly.

[Josiah]

Well it seemed he was right about the seeing her in her skivvies, of well it was not like he hadn’t seen it before, in fact he had seen more of her then he would have like to admit but he did the best he could to block such thoughts from being reacouring ones. After all it didn’t make sense to see her in the lust full light others probably did, it just wasn’t his style.

When they got inside she had seemed to eye a music store all to enthusiasticly her eyes more on the drums in the window then the actual store itself, it was slightly frightening that she let herself be over come so easily but then again it was his own choice not to feel happiness and joy, he had to deal with the fact most people in this world enjoyed such sensations.

Her grip tightened slightly and his eyes looked to her as she eyed the window, the proverbial kid at the candy store look twinkling in her eyes.

“Well….if you want to go in there…they do have those mp3 players that you mentioned” he said with a light sigh bracing himself for the tug he knew he would feel as she would most likely drag him into the store

[Siege]

“Well….if you want to go in there…they do have those mp3 players that you mentioned”

Oh. Was that so? She had a feeling that he wasn't doing this for the MP3 player, but that he was trying to make her happy, and doing a good job of it. With a bright smile, she grabbed his hand, forgoing the shirt for the moment as together they rocketed across the mall and towards the store that held the drums within. entering, she beamed brightly, letting go of his hand after giving it an affectionate squeeze. Moving over to the drums, she touched the symbol with her fingers, almost affectionatly. She loved drums, and lime green was her favorite color. There couldn't possibly be a better set of drums.

Not that she could afford them, but she could certainly drool. She was so obviously not here for an MP3 player. If he wanted to get her one that was fine but fight now, she was too attracted to the drum set. Sitting on the small stool behind the drums, and took the beautiful sticks in her hand, they were black with silver and lime green accents, fitting perfectly into her hands as she looked at the set. She wasn't sure you were allowed to play them, but it felt nice to have a set of sticks in her hands.

"They're beautiful." she whispered as she looked around the store for a moment. Getting a nod from the man at the front of the store, she grinned and began to play. She was good, quite talented once you got past the fact it was glorified racket, she was actually talented, and was a natural.

[Josiah]

She grabbed his hand and dragged him into the music store before he could even realize it, he knew she had siad she had enjoyed drums but this was kind of frightening. As soon as she got in she released him and went to the lime green set, practically drooling over them as her eyes seemed like they would have popped out of her little tattooed face.

Soon she seemed to get the okay to play them and he could not help but grind his teeth a bit at the glorified nose she was generating. He enjoyed music he really did but he guessed that she was right, his taste was several decades to old for his age. He looked to her she seemed lost in the beat she was generating, she seemed focused almost determined, and with a sigh he say her rehabilitation.

He went to the front counter and did the shopping himself..

“Hey….I’ll take that lime green video ipod nano behind the counter” he siad pointing to the box in the show case. He then sighed “You by any chance wouldn’t sell any sound proofing earphones would you?” Josiah asked “You know, something I can wear over my ears to chancel out…oh a beating dumb”

The clerk seemed to grin “Yes we do…there not exactly cheap though”

Josiah just seemed to nod slightly “Its alright…neither am I….which is why your going to put the I pod…those headphones…and that set of drums on a shipping form” Josiah said as he reached for his wallet and pulled out his credit card “And your going to charge me for it”

Oh nothing better came to a clerks ears, soon enough papers were out infront of Josiah to be filled for a shipping address as his card was being run. He’d be done before she even finished with her little solo and he’d have a effective way to keep her occupied at home without having to compromise to much.

[Siege]

Siege blasted away on her drums, keeping the song playing in her mind. She loved music and there was almost nothing more wonderful that working your frustration out on a set that were in great condition. As the song ended, she sighed, gently, placing the sticks back in the holder she rose. Scanning the building she saw Josiah accept a reciept and figured that he had gotten the Ipod that he wanted to get her, she honestly didn't care what color it was, but that it played music and would work. She stepped down off the display and looked at him as he turned and headed for her. She was thankful that he had let her play, it had been better than he could realize, she could have spent all day with those, the color, the sound, the beat, everything was perfect.

As he came towards her, she smiled. Taking the edge of his sleeve again in her fingers, she gave one last longing look to the drums and then together they headed out. For a few minutes she was quiet, lost in thought. Thinking of the drum set that she would never have. But Siege was not one that let the small monetary things, and the lack there of get her own.

"Thanks for letting me play, Josiah."

Yeah, she had seen his real name on a plaque in his room this morning and decided there was no reason not to use it. It was a great deal better than Jo and Josh, so it would work better for her unless he hated it. She had her own real name, and it wasn't Siege, but he didn't know that, though she assumed it could be guessed. Though she found a lot of people around here had strange names so perhaps not.

"Okay so clothes, that's our goal here, and furniture at some point, they have this great ecclectic style stop at the other end of the mall that has hand painted and made furniture that's all stylish, you know.. my style.. maybe we could hit that joint after some clothes shopping." she volunteered

Siege flashed a smile to Josiah, still had her finger hooked into the split of his cuff. Her eyes then move to scan around the mall looking for the place she enjoyed buying her clothes.

"See any clothing stores we should hit?" she asked, hoping he'd have an opinion her clothes tended to come from the Salvation Army most often.

[Josiah]

She took the edge of his sleeve once more giving one last look to the drums she had just finished playing with . he had the receipt of the order form in his shirt pocket hidden just beneath the light black dress vest he had on his person. They left the store and he noticed how quite she was as though in thought, he was curious was her reaction would be later but he’d wait till they were home and not in public, he was not sure he could deal with that right now.

“So….you must have seen my name in my room it seems” He said after she used it “ Oh well…guess you don’t have a reason to call me pops anymore”. He siad looking to her, it was clear that he had no problem with his name actually being used but he was curious if she had ever heard the name Heartless Josiah, or Devil eyes Josiah. They were little names he had picked up the last once clearly a play on his red eyes and the fact that he was indeed a murderer.

She mentioned clothes and of course her furniture which she already knew were she wished to looking for.

“Well…it will be your room…so of course you should have things you want in there” he paused for a moment “So if your going to pick the furniture it only makes sense you pick a color out for it as well…right now it’s a white cream color so we can put just about anything you want over it” He had a feeling it was probably going to be the room the 90’s forgot but there was only one way to see though he would stand by his guess.

“As for your clothing….I think American Eagle or express should be your style…. You look like you enjoy that tight and alluring look” yes he had taken notice of her clothes and was doing his best not to let his eyes stare , he just wasn’t used to a girl being so skimpy around him.

His eyes caught their first sore and since she was holding onto him he simply just turned slightly and kept her tow.

[Siege]

“Well…it will be your room…so of course you should have things you want in there”

“So if your going to pick the furniture it only makes sense you pick a color out for it as well…right now it’s a white cream color so we can put just about anything you want over it”

Cream? How boring. She wasn't sure what she wanted to paint it but something loud definatly. She was leaning towards lime green, it was her favorite color but then again, if she ever saved up enough for the drum set it would just melt into the back ground. Red was too cliche. Black was depressing. Purple was lame. Hmmm, teal though, could work very nicely. A nice summery teal color, yes that was what she would paint her room make it very nice and breezey.

"I think we should paint it teal." she mentioned to him as they walked, she still attatched to his shirt cuff, trying her hardest to be in contact without actually having to touch him all together.

“As for your clothing….I think American Eagle or express should be your style…. You look like you enjoy that tight and alluring look”

Siege's brow rose. Alluring, currently yes, because she loved watching him TRY as hard as possible not to look at her body. While other men did so very openly. She figured it was his way of being attracted to her, she had never taken him as the kind of man that would be very hands on. But look from the side of his eyes trying to catch a peak when she wasn't paying attention. He turned suddenly and she followed, as he lead her to the first of their clothing stores.

"Help me pick out stuff, to be frank, I don't know what's a good buy or not, all my clothes come from Good Will or Salvation Army." she admitted, shyly.

As they stepped into the store, she stopped and took stock of what she was seeing, a lot of it was a bit preppy but she could add her own twists, and with her attitude it would't be as preppy. She looked up at him and let go of his shirt, as she began to move through the racks, to find something that she wanted to try on. Slowly she began to pick things out for herself and create a pile in her arms, rifling through the racks both clearance as well as full price. She even picked out a few things to surprise him with, and a lot that she liked or that she could work to her own kind of style with the right jeans and what not.

"Find anything good?" she asked him, looking up with her grey eyes trying to find him.

[Josiah]

Teal huh, it was something he guessed he could live with, it was the color she would be staring at all the time not himself, then again with the sky light in her room he was sure she’d be looking up at the stars more then anything at night. He just gave her a simple nod in the end, if she was going to live there she needed her room to be hers, it would be her space and hers alone something he was sure she understood.

When they got to the store she asked him to help her pick some things out and he openly rolled his eyes. Wasn’t she the one giving him shit for his style? If that was the case why bother to ask for his help in finding clothes to wear. He had a feeling the female brain was one of strange complexities he was not suppose to understand, nor was any man for that matter, illogical and emotional, they saw things the way they wanted to even if in the end it made no sense.

But sure enough since she asked for his help he went around to look for something things. It didn’t take long, he was just picking random styles really and eyeballing her size.

“Hmm…I have no idea” he said turning to her. His hands had in them several pairs of pants and jeans as well as several corset and button tops. None of it was as old or as tired as his own personal style but it was probably more conservative then what she was used to though on her body it would be a different story.

“What about you….finding what you need?” he asked curiously

[Siege]

“Hmm…I have no idea”

Siege headed over to where he stood his arm drapped in different clothing. She was surprised that he had gotten her sizes pretty spot on. She rummaged through what he had picked keeping most of it knowing that she could work with it make it her own without having to go preppy but there were a few things that she hung back up, unwilling to wear pink for definate. She didn't do pink, there was just no feasible way that anyone could get her into it.

"Some of these are actually good."

“What about you….finding what you need?”

"Yeah mostly. come with me."

Her hand clasped his, and she lead him to the back where the dressing room area was. She was going to need opinions as well as facial reactions to her clothing or this was gonna be a bust. So she motioned to a seat.

"Sit."

She smiled at him and disappeared in one of the little rooms closing the door behind her. She hung up he clothes and undressed down into her bra. She put on a pair of nice dark wash jeans, that fit her nicely not too tight, and then pulled on a black tank top with wide straps and over that a red tank top with spaghetti straps over it, giving her that layered look. She came out, looking at herself in the mirror, but watching him for any kind of reaction what so ever.

"What do you think?" she asked curiously turning.

Depending on his reaction, she would either smile or purse her lips and return to the dressng room. Her next outfit was for him. She pulled on a white skirt, made of cotton it came midway down her thigh and stopped. Slightly ruffly at the bottom, much more preppy. Over that went a sky blue cami, and over that went a cute 3/4 sleeve unzipped pale yellow hoodie. She pulled on some long calf socks that were yellow and white stripes before she came out, watching him curiously.

[Josiah]

She dragged him over to the changing rooms where he knew what he was going to be subjected to. The only other men that had to do this shit were brothers and boyfriends, he did not see why he had to deal with it, but she seemed happy for some odd reason, one that he could not quite explain as she disappeared into the dressing room.

When she came out the first time his eyes over looked her, she asked him immediately what he thought and his eyes looked her over. “It looks good” he said to her unsure of what else he could offer then that. She had an attractive young body and so he had no idea why she was bothering to try this stuff on for approvals sake. No it just didn’t seem like her to need a second opinion.

She disappeared once more leaving Jo to sit there with his thoughts for a moment and what the hell was going on. Haris…his old boss the one that had taken him in once Jo had slashed that fuckers neck as a child, his words came to mind for a brief moment and he had no idea why. The advice was to move forward of course, to live even when life was tough and find joy to cling to. He saw those words in Siege.

He shook his head lightly tossing sentimental thoughts from his head, no that was not him, let the rest of the world be like that but not him. She had come out again this time in an outfit that actually made her look very female and not just because of the curves of her body for once.

His previous thoughts had caused his guard to drop alittle making his eyes just a shade lighter then what the normally were, Haris had been important in his life after all and the memories of his death hurt at times. His eyes looked at her, from her view she would most likely think this second of uncontrollable softness was from her feminine looking form at the moment, and it was probably best she did.

“Its nice” Josiah managed his eyes slowly starting to cool once more as he calmed his thoughts

[Siege]

Siege had to pause for a moment. His normally rock hard orbs were suddenly soft as his eyes ran over her form. Maybe he liked the girlish aspect more than she gave him credit for. Though it wasn't often her style she would get this one to wear every so often, maybe she would get to see more of those softer eyes. She smiled at him and squeezed his shoulder as she passed him after he gave his comment of ...

“Its nice”

In the dressing room she went through the rest of her clothes on her own figuring that some things had to be a surprise and he really didn't seem to care either way. So she spent the next twenty minutes trying on everything, putting some things to the side that she decided she didn't like or she couldn't work to look as unpreppy as possible but picked some of the things from both her selections and his before she came out with her arms full of clothes.

"Ready." she told him.

As he rose they would head to the register, her hands too full for touch, but she figured he might want a break on that anyway. It was hard for her not to want to touch him. Because in her mind she was helping him get over this anti touch problem of his, but on the other hand, she felt.. better.. when she was in contact with him. She was anxious a lot, even if it never showed, her bouncy personality, and her bitchiness, overwhelmed the fact that she had major anxieties of losing people that she had come to enjoy, that sh wanted to remain in her life for a long time to come. She didn't like thinking that one day he could decide she wasn't worth it and toss her out on the street again. But it was true, and this made her anxious, something that helped, for her, was having a physical hold on it. And that was probably why she touched him so much.

They placed the big pile of clothing on the counter and while the woman behind it began ringing it up, Siege went to the accessory rack and began pulling some things down that she knew would go with them. Mostly bracelets and necklaces, adding a few of those to the pile, before she leaned aganst Josiah, forgetting her earlier, decision for no touching she decided to see what woud happen if she put his arm around her small, toned, and bare waist. So.. she did.

[Josiah]

He sighed lightly as she disappeared back to the dressing room and disappeared for 20 or so minutes, he figured she was going through it all and so he just sat there, there was nothing in this store he needed to look at and so he just sat there waiting for the moment in which she would be done which was not horribly long at all for a girl going through so many new clothes.

When she came back out he nodded to her and stood up and went with her to the counter to pay for all this stuff. He seemed so detached it was a wonder why she was the was she was around him. He was sure she would have taken his earlier hints by now and just went to look for another guy to play with but she seemed to like being around him and not understanding why was driving him nuts.

As the women continued to ring them up and siege came back with some accessories Josiah just seemed to stare of into space, he didn’t care how much she spent today he knew it wasn’t a big deal. In the middle of his void she grabbed his arm and he blinked lghtly coming from his trace realizing his arm was around her now his hand touching her bare skin.

“That will be 859” the woman said behind the counter.

Josiah used it as an excuse, he took his arm from her waist and used it to grab his wallet and paid for the clothes she had gotten. After signing the receipt he put his wallet back and both his hands grabbed most of the bags on the counter, it was amazing how he just played it off using the need for his hands and arms to not touch her in such a way without trying to offend her.

“So where to next?” Josiah asked, he knew there was the furniture place and that trip to vicckies she had threatened him with