The Rain In Spain...Is A Massive Pain (Rai/GM)

[Sir Galahad]

The man's eyebrow twitched.

"Just... set them how you think they should be set."

[Rozalin Kendal]

Poseidon's balls, there were five forks. The discovery came as she sorted the utensils by type; Rozalin's brow also twitches!

Barbarians. No one in their right mind had this much silverware and restriction unless they meant to torture someone. Or murder them. With a sigh, she began placing the silverware, getting the basic dinner utensils in the correct places since she wasn't completely uncivilized. The soup spoon, she hesitated on, then placed outside the normal one, because soup was a thing, but not often at sea.

Her general array is knives with knives and so on, but only spanning out from the sides of the main plate, forks on the left and rest on the right instead of how it should be.

[Sir Galahad]

The man came over looked her... progress... and face palmed. Hard.

"Are you a completely incompetent swine?! How do you not even know silver ware?!"

With one swoop he would snatch up all of the silverware and promptly place it down with expert precision into their right spots.

"Memorize it!"

He'd give her exactly 3 seconds to look at the arrangement before wrecking it.

"Try again!"

[Rozalin Kendal]

And just like that, Rozalin went from being werided out by his actions on the walk to hating him again. Three seconds was nowhere near enough, but she remembered a little bit, like how the spoon was int eh right place even though she'd done it based off of never needing it. And the traitorous fork on the end of hte right side of the plate.

THe knives still weren't in the right order, as were the forks on the left, but the smaller silverware was arranged next to the small plate off to the side, knife across rather than an angle.

"There."

[Sir Galahad]

"WRONG!"

He would shout as he promptly moved all the silver ware back to it's correct positions, for 4 seconds this time, then he would ruin it again. Then slap the table with his wand, not speaking.

[Rozalin Kendal]

Her immediate reaction was to last out at the man again, only there were others now. Rozalin's brow twitched. Normally, that wouldn't bother her, but the last thing she needed was more people being able ot report her being difficult. Or mocking her failure.

Third time is the charm, however! She sets the silverware right, pausing only a moment between the fish and salad fork before giving the man an expectant look.

[Sir Galahad]

"Good. While the table arrangements are typically set up by servants you will likely never have to set it yourself. HOWEVER! It is important to know how these are supposed to be set up. Because if an assassin was to set the table they may not always have the... education to know which ware goes where. So you need to know. Now, for the real lesson. What is the purpose of each piece of silver ware?"

[Rozalin Kendal]

It felt like the first piece of relevant information Rozalin had gotten that day other than that she was doing it wrong. Not only what she needed to know, but why. Given her position, it was a big why, and while she gave her tutor a serious look as she reconsidered his usefulness in her mind, she nodded in silent agreement. An assassin may or may not one day fumble the setup. May.

Looking back at the mess of cutlery in front of her, the pirate - the Commander - stifled a groan and let her gaze rake over the setup before pointing to the silverware as she went. The basic dinner pieces were obvious, aside from the meat and salad knife, then the soup spoon. The plates, she got right, though she frowned at the little butter knife.

"I'm assuming that's there for less mess." Nodding to the glasses, she continued, "And that's a waste." The seafood cutlery threw her still, but she was trying. Just not repentant.

[Sir Galahad]

To be honest, Roz had gotten more right than he expected of her. But not enough for him to be ok.

"Useless."

He would sigh and point at each one explaining in PAINFULLY THOROUGH DETAILS the rhyme and reason for each and every piece of silver ware. Including history lessons on when and why they came to be, and what purpose they had through out history. He droned worse than a college professor, the only saving grace is that he had no problem cursing... in the special and unique way that upper class citizens enjoy insulting each other with back handed compliments, if there was any skill Roz might enjoy learning from him, it would definitely be his vocabulary.

After his long winded explanations he would ask her.

"So, do you think you understand now?"

He wouldn't wait for an answer however. Merely clapping his hands signalling for the serving staff to bring in and set up a spot next to Roz with more table settings, the man would then take a seat at this spot. Clapping again another round of servants would bring in a 5 course meal setting it on the table ranging from soups, to salads, a variety of meats, and even a few vegan options, some elegant cheeses, breads, and of course, desserts.

"I want you to tell me what each utensil goes to, and I want you to tell me why. If you are correct you may eat. If you are wrong, you will wear it for the duration of your training today."

[Rozalin Kendal]

Roz is forced to listen to the painfully long-winded and thorough explanation! She did admire the backhanded compliments - that was something she could appreciate on an entirely different level. She was fairly certain she heard Ari falling asleep, or at least snoring.

'You could actually help, you know.' The thought was greeted with the sense of Ari shrugging lamenting the old days. It was just as well her mentor didn't expect an actual response. Until he threatened her clothes, anyway. She couldn't even process that seriously, staring wide-eyed as platter after platter of food was brought out and arranged before her.

"All of this for one meal?" Was this even real? It had to be joke, a test for her to call him out on overindulgence or some nonsense. How in the world did people have this much food, this splendor - and have the luxury to threaten to dump it on her if she failed. How much of this could be used to feed a crew on the seas, if it could be preserved?

[Sir Galahad]

The man would cross his arms and tap his shoulder. Waiting.

[Rozalin Kendal]

Rozalin sighed and looked at the spread before her, starting with the desert utensils since they were the smallest and thus easiest. She was still trying to sift through the spiel and remember what was actually important and not just the history of what and why. If he quizzed her on those, she'd fail. Hardcore.

Soups were another easy one, since they were liquid and the spoon for them was wider. She tried to recall the shapes of the silverware rather than the placement. The fish knife was matched to a fish platter, but the meat and salad fork were similar enough for her to mix, along with the knives for the same types. The little knife went to butter.

She waited in semi hostile silence!

[Sir Galahad]

The man smiled for the first time.

"Ah, now see, that wasn't so hard was it?"

He would then personally get up to serve her. Filling a bowl with some soup, preparing a bowl of salad with a healthy serving of dressing. A roll, and a little bit of a few other things only stopping to hesitate on the meats.

"Ah, pardon, but which meat would you like?"

[Rozalin Kendal]

Rozalin eyed him warily. Why was he just now asking her?

"The beef is fine. If you please." She remembers her manners at the last second.

[Sir Galahad]

"An excellent choice he would say with a smile."

He would then promptly serve everything to her... except for the beed and salad, which he would flip the ENTIRE PLATTERS OF, on to Roz.

"HOW COULD YOU GET THE MEAT AND SALAD WARE WRONG? YOU IMBECILE!"